Day Nine, Santorini

Today I was supposed to go ride donkeys but on account of my actions the night before I was unable to get out of bed until noon. I'd been on the fence about doing the famous Santorini donkey ride in the first place, to me it seems cruel to make the donkeys climb up and down the cliffs all day, so I wasn't bummed about missing out. Kelly went without me and had a great time, plus they stopped at the amazing gyro place Dave kept talking about, which I never ended up going to. I should mention the donkey stench. Yes, Santorini is probably the most beautiful place I've ever been however, while you're enjoying the breathtaking sights, occasionally an overpowering donkey smell lingers in the air. I guess the paths they lead the donkeys on are covered in donkey poop and inevitably it's not an easy smell to cover up. Add in the nice breezes of the island and the poop smell gets whisked around quite a bit. It's bearable, but definitely noticeable, especially while enjoying dinner at an outdoor restaurant.

So this morning was the true beginning of my battle with the Contiki plague. My throat felt like it was closing up on itself. I'd taken a liking to stealing honey packets during breakfast and downing those throughout the day to soothe my throat, and on this day I ate about 5 of these before I was able to even get out of bed. When I finally got up I threw on my bathing suit and grabbed some nail polish to go sit by the pool and touch up my nails. I figured everyone had gone on the donkey ride so I'd be alone but I was happy to find Teneal, Layne, the Kazzies, Dominique and Alex out at the pool. Teneal had even picked up a ham and cheese croissant for me for breakfast, that's why I love her! Today was a lazy day just lounging by the pool and listening to music. When everyone got back from the donkey ride pretty much all of them came out to the pool, too. I definitely needed a day like this to recharge and relax, I didn't even drink anything all afternoon (unbelievable, I know).

That night was the optional excursion to the village of Oia to watch the sunset. This is a gorgeous little town famous for its sunsets. Personally, the sunset wasn't any more amazing than the ones we'd seen the past few nights in Fira. But this optional was still worth going on, I think the whole group went, and this is when we took our group picture. Plus it was a cute town and I took tons of pictures that came out great despite me having zero photography skills. Dave brought along a picnic for us of a bunch of different cheese, crackers, chips and of course wine. Everyone just stood around in this little square waiting for the sun to set, it ended up getting pretty crowded in there the closer it got to the actual sunset. There were a few stray dogs hanging around that we kept feeding. It always makes me sad to see stray animals but I think these two dogs had a decent life mooching off of tourists.

Most of the group ended up going back to Murphy's to watch a huge soccer game(I refuse to call it football!). I think it was Germany versus Spain (I'm such an American). I was planning on going but on the bus ride back to Fira I was falling asleep and felt horrible. We did have on board entertainment on the ride back, a few people got on the microphone on the bus and sang acapella. Jose had to sing a Backstreet Boys song because apparently his donkey came in last place and that was his punishment. Then Staker sang Endless Love, I think both the male AND female parts, it was pretty damn good. I can't remember who else sang, but I do remember Scotty was passed out during all of this and he was sitting right at the front of the bus where people were singing, I swear he can sleep anywhere. I got off the bus with a handful of other people who were calling it a night, I decided it was better to rest up for crazy ass Ios where we'd be heading the next day than stay up and watch a soccer game I had no interest in. This was by far the most tame day of the whole trip, but I think staying in this night is what saved me for the next 3 insane days.

Day Eight, Santorini

Note: I started this blog a few weeks after I got back from Greece in July and am just now picking back up (it's mid January). Details and such will probably suffer for the remainder of this but I'm determined to get it all done!

Today I woke up with a sore throat and fortunately kept it at bay for a few days by eating copious amounts of honey. The breakfast at this hotel paled in comparison to what we had in Mykonos, but there was a great cafe up the street with amazing pastries. As I said earlier, I ate a truckload of their ham and cheese croissants and partially blame them for my 5 pound weight gain over 2 weeks (I'm convinced the only thing that kept me from gaining 10 pounds was the constant dancing).

Today was the optional tour of the island that included a stop at two beaches, a winery and a museum. I'm so glad Kelly and I decided not to do this because this ended up being one of my favorite days of the trip. We rented jeeps with the honeymooners and the Kazzies and explored the island on our own. Layne and Teneal bought a compilation set of cheesy 80s/disco CDs while they were in Italy which were perfect for blasting through the streets of Santorini. I hopped in the back of Scotty and Stampy's jeep and we immediately put on The Neverending Story, which we played another 10 times during our ride. Santorini is nothing but cliffs and winding narrow roads and I was nervous about putting my life in the hands of Stampy, who I'd watched simultaneously chug two beers the previous night. One wouldn't assume a great drinker would also be a great driver, but he kept us alive and we never stalled out (I can't say the same for the other jeep).

We weren't really sure where we were heading but somehow meandered up to the highest point in Santorini. On the way up it seemed completely plausible we'd witness another car, or even our own, run off the road and tumble down the cliff. Once we got to the top we got out for some awesome views and pictures and then headed down to the famous Black Beach, a gorgeous beach with smooth black pebbles. We hung out on the beach for a few hours and then decided we'd try to find another one of Santorini's famous beaches, the red beach. We eventually made it to the red beach but didn't actually get to see it because it involved climbing up a cliff and then walking down to the beach. Since we had our beloved cripple with us, instead we sat at a small cafe by the water and had sandwiches and drinks and shot the shit for a while. There was a nice woman with a baby in a stroller sitting at the table next to us and I fear we scarred her baby for life... small children shouldn't have been allowed anywhere near us. A man was walking around selling bootleg CDs and DVDs for super cheap, so of course we bought some crap (update: Kelly and I watched the Sex and the City DVD and other than the Greek subtitles and sometimes sketchy sound, it was worth every euro). By now it was getting close to dinnertime so we headed back to the hotel, this time I hopped in the jeep with Layne and Kelly and we jammed to a bootleg Michael Jackson History CD. This was such a chill day and by this time the 6 of us were a solid little group.

Tonight the whole Contiki went to dinner together to a restaurant recommended by Dave. He raved about the grilled octopus, which I was a little skeptical about considering just a few days before in Mykonos I'd seen octopus hanging out to dry in the sun. The great thing about the whole group going places together even when it wasn't on the itinerary was Dave would organized our transportation. We had to walk a short way up a hill by our hotel to catch a coach bus which then took us into the town. Once again the views as the sun was going down were incredible, only now our restaurant was an even better vantage point for the amazing sunset. During dinner we sat with Dominique, Alex, Nat and Linda. Kelly and I ordered an appetizer that was a block of feta wrapped in phyllo dough and drizzled with honey and sesame seeds which came highly recommended from our personal Greece expert, Alex. Maybe it was the combination of the scenery, company and an all around awesome day, but I swear this was one of the best things I've ever tasted. As our main course Kelly and I split the grilled octopus and a seafood marinara pasta, both were excellent.

After dinner everyone headed to a bar called Murphy's that had a 2 for 1 deal until 10. Judging by the pictures displayed behind the bar of naked patrons dancing on the bar, we were in for a good time. This bar had a very American feel and played great music, lots of rock and pop. Our drink of choice was called a Sex on the Bar, which I think was the same thing as a Sex on the Beach except with a name more fitting for Greece. We ordered as many as we could hold at once, afterall it was 2 for 1. Teneal ended up giving a performance on the bar later, yes she kept her clothes on but it was still quite a sight!

We continued dancing and singing until it was time to catch a cab home, but we decided we weren't done for the night yet. We attempted to hang out by the hotel pool and continue drinking but were greeted by the scary Russian man who worked the hotel desk at night. Dave had warned us about him and he was right, this guy was terrifying! I scurried into the Kazzies room with Teneal and Layne and that's when the night took a crazy twist... we realized the jeeps we rented that day were in our possession until tomorrow. The 5 of us piled into one of the jeeps and we were on our way back to Black Beach to watch the sun come up! This was one of the craziest things I've EVER done and I'm not sure how we survived or didn't get arrested. Not only were we all blind drunk but we had no clue where we were going and it was pitch dark. One of the funniest things was watching Scotty fast asleep in the passenger seat and Layne swerving the jeep trying to wake him up, but he didn't even wake up and instead almost went flying out the side of the jeep and over a cliff a few times. By the time we got to the beach the sun was starting to come up so we laid on lounge chairs on the beach and in our drunken, sleepy haze gawked at the magnificent sunrise. In that moment it felt like there was nothing else in the world but that beach, those people and the sun slowly creeping out of the ocean. How many people can say they've watched sun set and rise in Santorini on the same day? One of the most beautiful, serene things I've ever seen and yet none of us thought to bring a camera along. Amazingly we made it back to the hotel and I pounded on our door around 7:30 a.m. for Kelly to let me in. The next morning I'd wake up with my throat on fire, but it was definitely worth it.

Day Seven, Mykonos to Santorini

On our last morning in Mykonos, Kelly and I had no shame walking to the dining room looking a hot mess for our final breakfast at the awesome hotel buffet. I still salivate just thinking about this breakfast, and back home I'm not even a big breakfast person. I think filling up on a hearty breakfast before we were fully awake is what kept the hangovers away. We had to be out of our rooms around 10 or 11 this morning, can't remember what time exactly, only to sit around in the lobby until 12:30 for our bus to the port (and yes, the skinny dipping bus driver drove us there). Kelly and I lounged on the lobby couches for a while then walked to the beach for a few more pictures (and to look for my underwear). Right before we were boarding the bus I went to the bar for a bottle of water only to find my more hardcore compadres drinking by the pool. I wish I brought a breathalyzer with me because I'm sure several people would have blown well above the legal limit before noon every day.

Our ferry wasn't leaving until 2:30, giving us time to go into Mykonos town for lunch. Dave waited at the dock with all of our bags to allow us to wander around. The restaurant we settled on was mediocre at best. A few people ordered hamburgers and, like my hamburger at Paradise Beach, they were veggie burgers... or atleast not cow meat. Someone ordered spaghetti bolognese and once again it was not cow but most likely lamb. Despite the cows that woke me up outside my room every morning, I don't think Mykonos is a big beef producer.

Have I mentioned how windy it was in Mykonos? I didn't mind it so much since if there was no wind it would probably be way too hot, but a few times on the beach the sand would be pummeling us. Just standing around waiting to board the wind was whipping pretty hard, which is kind of scary when a strong gust comes while you're lugging a 35-pound suitcase up a rickety ferry ramp. I sat next to Scotty on the ferry which was not a good thing for our fellow passengers. We continued drinking and blasted my ipod for the entire ride. Turns out his taste in music is as awesome (or horrible, depending who you ask) as mine, so Scotty was attached to my ipod speakers for the rest of the trip. It took us around 3 hours to get to Santorini and there was no mistaking we'd arrived. Pulling into the port we had a beautiful view of cliffs rising dramatically out of the sea. As per usual in Greece the sky was cloudless and rich blue, the perfect backdrop for the white buildings topping the cliffs. I was both in awe of the views and scared for my life as our bus ambled up the narrow roads.

We stayed at the small, family-owned Hotel Nikolas, a cute cluster of yellow and coral buildings. While we were checking in I went to the bar for a bottle of water, but I only had bills in increments of 50 (what a baller, I know). Since most places won't break 50 euro notes for small purchases, I figured I would mooch some change off someone else. Instead the girl just handed me the water and waved me away, telling me I could just pay her back later. I was amazed they were working on the honor system here. This happened to me AGAIN at a little market up the street from our hotel. I went to the counter with water and a ham and cheese croissant (I ate at least 5 of these from this place while we were in Santorini... they were ridiculous) only to find I had nothing but 50 euro. The guy behind the counter shrugged and told me it was OK, I could still take it. Granted, this was toward the end of my time in Santorini and I had already single-handedly increased this man's ham and cheese croissant sales for the week by 250%, so I could understand a little freebie. But still... this would never, ever happen at home. Free lunches exist only in Greece.

By the time we got to the hotel we had just enough time to clean up before dinner. This was the night of our included dinner (we had one included dinner at each stop), but instead of being fed at our hotel like on our previous included dinners, we went to a restaurant in town. A bus picked us up and dropped us off in the main part of town. From there we walked, or I should say climbed, the steep cobblestone paths meandering through the maze of restaurants and shops. Suddenly the path gave way to an open terrace and we had incredible views of the sun going down over the caldera (basically a bay that is actually a crater formed by volcanic activity). It was the exact view of what you see in postcards of Santorini. Looking in one direction you'd see white buildings perilously hugging the side of the cliffs. In the other direction the sky was hazy and the sun was inching its way toward the water. It looked like a backdrop more than the real thing to me, probably because I'd never seen anything like this. Dave let us gawk for a moment before ushering us toward the restaurant.

The beautiful views continued as we ate dinner while the sun went down. Kelly and I sat with Sylvia, Michelle, Scotty and Layne. Something I was completely unaware of was pointed out to us during one of our dinnertime conversations. Apparently Americans excessively say "thank you." I honestly have never noticed how much I say it until this very conversation. The funny thing is the Aussies said they'd picked up on it from us and had started saying it, too, but of course I hadn't noticed because excessive use of "thank you" doesn't phase me. It just goes to show being polite has nothing to do with saying "please" or "thank you," considering some of the nicest and most genuine people I've met don't use those words half as much as my rude ass does! For dinner we had Greek salad and moussaka. I've never had moussaka, which is a layered eggplant, meat and cheese dish and probably one of the most well known Greek dishes. I didn't enjoy it, only because the secret ingredient happens to be cinnamon (blah). For dessert we were served Greek yogurt and honey. I don't like the normal crappy American yogurt to begin with but Greek yogurt is like Yoplait on steroids. It's very thick and very sour (that's what she said). Not my cup of tea, but that was alright because the less I eat the quicker I get drunk.

After dinner we headed straight to a little bar Dave claims is usually his hideaway when he needs escape from his Contiki groups (probably bullshit, but I'll buy it). He told us not to have a big night, but of course that didn't happen. Kelly and I cozied up to the DJ, who denied our incessant requests for Lionel Richie (plus he was Australian, so I just KNOW he had some Lionel). At one point I was standing at the bar with Scotty and suddenly he got really angry out of nowhere. I motioned for Kelly and warned her I think we were about to see the dark side of drunk Scotty, so I whisked him outside and had her go find Stampy to diffuse the situation. As soon as Stampy came outside, Scotty was fine! He was only mad because he couldn't find Stampy. Kelly and I just about died laughing over this and we all went back inside to continue the good time. The drinks kept flowing and pretty soon I turn to rum and Coke Light, a surefire way to bring Drunk Kerry out real fast. By now, we've noticed the Aussies live up to one stereotype... they LOVE "Land From Down Under" by Men at Work. I could be wrong, but I think the Australian government has actually instilled laws that men can't wear shirts while that song is playing. Once the DJ put it on, we had a handful of Aussie boys dancing around shirtless. For the rest of the trip I would become worried if the boys kept their shirts on for an entire night out. Another highlight of the night was when the DJ finally granted one of my requests and played "I'm So Excited." Everyone was sufficiently drunk at that point and we all went nuts. So much for not having a big night, sorry Dave! Soon Kelly was ready to pack it up and go home, so I used my patented "Ok, let me just finish my drink" line which inevitably leads to me having 4 more drinks and Kelly ready to kill me. But she outsmarted me this night and found out the magic words "Dave's leaving" are all it takes to get me to go homeWe took a few cabs back to the hotel, at which time Sylvia realized we'd lost Michelle somewhere along the way. In her drunken state, she refused to go up to her room and go to bed. It took Kelly, Stampy and me to put her to bed, which must have been quite a sight. Imagine 3 drunk idiots trying to coerce another drunk idiot to get into bed.

Fortunately Michelle didn't end up on the side of a milk carton, but Staker almost did. He got separated from everyone and wandered the streets of Santorini until the next afternoon! Keep in mind Dave handed out "don't get lost" sheets on our first day with the names of all our hotels but obviously no one carried them around, that would be too sensible. Poor Staker had no idea what the name of our hotel was so he didn't make it home until some of the girls found him wandering the next day when they were in town shopping. That is a classic Contiki story right there.

Day Six, Mykonos

Waking up naked on a bare mattress is not a good way to start the day. Fortunately my day only got better. We once again got up early enough to pig out at breakfast. We spent the morning laying by the pool with some of our group and looked at everyone's ridiculous pictures from Paradise Beach. Dave asked what we wanted to do that night and I suggested we have a theme party, specifically a toga party. I thought he would make fun of me for wanting to do something so stereotypical but we soon had a toga party on the agenda for the night. I was pumped... a toga party in Greece is quite a step up from a frat house.

There was a restaurant close to our hotel that everyone raved about so Kelly and I wanted to eat there before we left the island. We went there for lunch with Teneal and the Kazzies. My lunch was so delicious, spaghetti with feta, tomatoes and fresh herbs. We had a few drinks with lunch and did not stop drinking until the early morning hours. After lunch we posted up at the pool bar and chatted up Yorgos. He started giving us shots and our leisurely afternoon turned into drunken shenanigans. I also noticed Yorgos wasn't charging me for some of my beers. That was one of the many great things about Greece, bartenders wouldn't hesitate to give you a free drink for every few you ordered. I'd been loud and proud about my tendency to pee in public and I was openly peeing in the pool (I'll admit I'm gross... the pool was saltwater and I don't think there was any chlorine in it). Kelly and Teneal did the most intense body shot I've ever seen. Around 6:00 we stumbled inside to get ready for dinner. The drinking didn't stop there, though. We conveniently had a shelf in our shower that was perfect for holding a Mythos.

Tonight was our included dinner, a buffet at the hotel. From what I can remember it was pretty good, but I was anxious for dinner to end so I could suit up in my toga. I do remember there being really good watermelon, probably because I ate several pounds of it. Side note: I went to town anytime there was fresh fruit at a meal. I think this helped in avoiding full-blown illness over the course of the trip. We went back to the room to style white sheets into a toga. Our toga design was cute but not built to the body.

The toga party was in the "club" of our hotel, which I think serves only as a holding cell to keep the Contikis from running rampant around the property all night. The other Contiki group we had gone with to Paradise Beach was also in attendance. Other than them the only other people who joined the party were random staff members (Kelly's front desk guy, for example). Yorgos had the playlist I made for him downloaded onto his computer but for some reason it wouldn't play. That's not to say we didn't try to make it work... we were given free range of anything we wanted to touch on the DJ equipment, which was a pretty elaborate system. We were also allowed to go behind the bar and pour drinks. They really do let you get away with anything in Greece. I had a feeling our togas wouldn't stay on for long. Within maybe 20 minutes of the party starting, Layne revealed he had made his own homemade Elephant Man trunk using a sock and a shoestring. For the rest of the night he let his elephant hang out. It took a few more drinks but soon some of us turned our togas into capes, and most had very little or nothing on underneath. There was a rather portly fellow from the other Contiki who leeched onto us. No one really knew who he was or where he came from. But once he saw Kelly's fondness for lifting up her toga, he followed her around the rest of the night.

As the night wore on we were no longer content to stay fully dressed and indoors. I'm not sure who gave the signal, but it was time to get naked. A handful of us ran across the street to the beach and skinny dipped. As I looked around in my drunken stupor to figure out who my fellow exhibitionists were, I noticed a few unfamiliar faces (and bodies). Kelly's boyfriend from the other Contiki had joined us. He even picked Kelly up in her birthday suit (GROSS!). That guy really had no concept of personal boundaries, not to mention he was suffering from a crippling case of shrinkage. As if that wasn't bad enough, the guy who was our BUS DRIVER for our duration in Mykonos was butt ass naked in the ocean right alongside us. Where the hell did he come from? We splashed around for awhile until realizing just how cold it was, then everyone ran out to jump in the hot tub. Somewhere in the confusion I lost my underwear and my camera. Kelly and I wandered the beach for awhile in search of my camera, but no luck. I was almost in tears, so we went back to the hotel to look for it (I'm pretty sure we were just wrapped in wet white sheets at this point). Fortunately Layne had grabbed it down at the beach and we finally figured out he had it. We were going to join the group in the hot tub, but Kelly's new friend was heading toward us so we took off back to our room. I think it was somewhere between 2:00 a.m. and 3:00 a.m. when we called it a night. We'd been drinking non-stop since noon. Greece fucking rocks!

Day Five, Mykonos

I hop out of bed around 9:00 thanks in part to the cows mooing outside the window but also because I magically transformed into a morning person while in Greece. I go to open the shutters to check the weather, momentarily forgetting there's no need to do this... every day is sunny (NO clouds at all), windy, and about 80 degrees. Breakfast is served until 10:30 so we're happy we've woken up so early. The breakfast is AMAZING. It's a big buffet and there are also tons of delicious pastries as there's a pastry chef on site. I pile my plate high with fried eggs, homefries, bacon, fruit, and lots of the delicious pastries. This breakfast is so satisfying and just another reason I never want to leave this hotel.

We walk across the street and see the beach for the first time. There's hardly anyone out there as it's still pretty early and I think everyone was still hurting from the night before. We lay out for awhile and then walk back toward the pool. On our way we run into Kelly's friend from the night before... front desk guy! She tries to avoid eye contact but he comes straight for her and chats her up. I'm loving it but she's clearly not as amused.

Up until now we've pretty much been killing time until our optional for the day... Paradise Beach! I'd been anticipating this day ever since I saw videos of this place on You Tube. It looked crazy in the videos I'd seen so I was hoping it would live up to my expectations. It's a beautiful beach and there's a huge bar and a bunch of tables on the beach. I spot a huge table with no chairs at it right next to the bar and I already know this serves as a dance platform. I notice a lot of extremely beautiful men walking around but I figure they're either gay or skeevy Italians or Greeks. We get a table and order bottle service (yeah, we're fancy!) for 70 euros. This sounds exorbitant but split between Kelly and me it's only 35 euro each for a bottle of Absolut and as many mixers as we want (we went with tonic and cranberry juice). I ordered a hamburger but it's more like a veggie burger so I only have a few bites. Drinking vodka on an empty stomach is a great plan. I see Dave filling a water gun with vodka at Teneal's table and I already know what's coming. I run over to the table just as he's squirting vodka in Teneal's mouth and of course I'm next in line.

Dave points out a creepy looking guy parading around in boxer shorts and tells us to keep an eye on him. Soon this guy is up on one of the platforms with the emcee (Greek Howard Stern). He removes his boxers and reveals a thong decorated as an elephant on the front side (you can guess what was in the trunk). Turns out Elephant Man is a famous Italian porn star who is paid to come to Paradise Beach every summer and show off his trunk. We all get a good laugh just staring at him for awhile and trying to figure out if he's filling up the entire trunk of the elephant. This sets the tone for the rest of the day and from then on it's complete craziness. Our drinks get stronger and stronger and soon we're drinking straight from the vodka bottle. Our entire group gets up on the table by the bar and we go nuts dancing and pouring vodka down each other's throats. At one point Kelly and I go to the bathroom and I'm so drunk that I pee all over my feet, soaking my flip flops. When we get back to the group I nonchalantly toss my urine-soaked shoes under one of the tables.

As the sun starts to go down a bunch of us run down to the ocean. We play around in the water just acting stupid, no one noticing at the time we were being swarmed by jellyfish. When we get out of the water most of the girls have huge welts all over their bodies (for some reason I was spared, maybe it was because I was covered in my own pee). Dave pulls some of the victims off to the bar to put vinegar on the stings (most of us offered to pee on them to ease the pain) and then it's back to party time. By this point we've lost all inhibitions and we're dancing on the tables in nothing but our bikinis. We realize our time here is almost done and our vodka is now gone so Kelly and I hatch a brilliant plan. We decide to get the strongest drink they make at the bar, a Devil's Tongue (it has something ridiculous like 20 liquors in it and it's bright green). A while later I look around and see that most of our tour is missing. Teneal and I have a moment of panic and think we've been left here (which wouldn't be such a bad thing). To make matters worse I can't find my flip flops, but I'm also not shocked I've lost a pair of shoes while drinking. We see Scotty coming out of the bathroom and I mention my lost shoes... next thing I know he pulls them out of the front of his bathing suit (!?!?). Score! We stumble off toward the bus and are pleasantly surprised to see it's still there. On the ride back we're mixed in with another Contiki group. I hear the girl sitting across the aisle from us going off about how she hates Americans. I listen for a few minutes before informing her that Kelly and I are Americans (I just love making stupid people feel like assholes). She tries to cover her ass but doesn't do a very good job. Thankfully no one from the other Contiki was on our tour because it was full of douches.

When we get back to the hotel, somehow a number of us are still capable of drinking so we head straight for the bar. The hotel had nightly entertainment, presumably for the sober guests, and tonight was a couple doing traditional Greek dancing. This took place right in the bar area so of course we all joined in. I remember thinking to myself I could easily pick up on their moves but instead I just fell all over myself. Later in the night Staker had the brilliant idea of getting Jake's video camera from their room, so I spent the rest of the night videotaping everyone and of course providing quality narration (how I wish I had watched the video when I was sober!). Of all the nights on the trip this one is actually the only one I can only remember bits and pieces of... possibly because I was so drunk but also since it was so early in the trip (plus Kelly went back to the room early and she and I used to recap the previous night the next morning... so now I'm working on my memory only and don't have Kelly to help me out). I do remember going back to the room at the end of the night completely smashed, stripping out of my bathing suit I'd been wearing all day and waking up Kelly to warn her not to look because I was butt naked. I think it's safe to say I had a good day.

Day Four, Mykonos

I was expecting our ferry to Mykonos to be more in line with the Staten Island ferry, but Greek ferries are huge and more like cruise ships. Our departure time is 7:30 a.m. so everyone isn't in the mood to do much but sleep once we get on board. Unfortunately it smells like the last person to sit in my seat has never seen a stick of deodorant, but once I get over the stench I drift in and out of sleep for awhile. Few things are as comforting to me as the lull of the ocean and I can sleep like a baby on boats. A few hours into the trip a little Greek boy sitting near us runs over and punches Kelly. Two women, presumably his mother and grandmother, watch as he hits Kelly for a second, third, and fourth time. It's crazy that people let their children run around hitting strangers. Then again, there are no rules in Greece.

The ferry ride takes about 5 hours and then we take a 20-minute bus ride to our hotel. During our drive we pass by nothing but whitewashed houses with blue windows...this is what I've been waiting for, we're really in Greece! Our hotel is nowhere near the main part of town, but that's fine by me because a beautiful beach is steps from the front door. The pool is beautiful and has a volleyball net and diving board (uh oh, I feel an injury coming on). There's also a bar at the pool, excellent. We check in to our room which is modest and reminiscent of the guest room in a grandma's house. The beds look pretty old but they must be sturdy because I'm sure they've seen their fair share of action. This is probably the least nice hotel room during the tour, which is strange because the grounds at this hotel are much nicer in comparison to the rooms. Maybe we just got a shitty room. We have a view of a field full of goats and later find out there are cows out there, too (I wake up to mooing every morning).

By now it's mid-afternoon and we join some of our buddies at the pool to have a few drinks and get some sun. Some of us show off on the diving board and find out the pool is filled with saltwater which kind of makes me feel like I'm on a cruise ship. I make friends with the pool bartender, Yorgos, who also serves as the hotel deejay. He asks me to make him a list of current American music and I can't help but laugh because he has no idea who he's dealing with. I make a short list of the few current songs I know and surprisingly don't slip any Phil Collins in for good measure. We head inside around 5:00 to get ready for tonight's optional, dinner and bar hopping in Mykonos town (cost: somewhere around 30 euro). We take a bus into town and much to our delight, Missionary Man plays on the radio during the ride. Of course Kelly and I are the only people that know this song. Once we start walking through town I find myself leading the pack alongside Dave. We have a hilarious chat about euphemisms for vaginas. I think this was when I realized he's even more of a crude smartass than I am and from there on out I adored him.

We stop at a few landmarks in town (a famous church, the Ramrod club, the windmills) for photo ops. Dave tells us there are more than 500 churches on the island and I believe him; every other door we pass is the door of a church. I guess a lot of people need to repent their sins after visiting this island. The town is exactly what I pictured: a labyrinth of narrow cobblestone sidewalks weaving in and out of white buildings. Every few meters an alleyway leads to the sea and the blue water contrasting against the white of the buildings, especially as the sun is going down, is an awesome sight. We have dinner at an open air restaurant. There's another Contiki group already at this restaurant, too, making me skeptical about the quality of the food. My first impressions are wrong, dinner is amazing! We have Greek salad, fried cheese (Teneal says it's called houloomi, which I had never heard of before but it's delicious), fried zucchini balls (these aren't very good), and a whole sea bass (eyes, teeth, and all!). I'm not usually a fan of staring into the eyes of my food but this is one of the best fish I've ever eaten. The incredible thing about the food in Greece is it's prepared very simply but since it's so fresh everything is full of flavor. I could write an entire post about feta cheese but I will just say it's SO much better than at home (and I love the feta at home). I would have been perfectly happy eating nothing but feta and tomatoes for 2 weeks. During dinner we find out a little more about Scotty and Stampy. We'd heard they live in Kazakhstan and had thought it was a joke but turns out they do in fact live in Borat's home country. They work for 8 weeks and get to travel for 4 weeks so to them it's worth living in the middle of nowhere. I'm completely confused by this but also intrigued as I've never heard of a work arrangement like theirs. For dessert we have some type of pie and I have my first and last shot of ouzo (I couldn't stomach it, it's brutal). Kelly and I also killed a huge bottle of wine with our meal so by now I'm ready to stop stuffing my face and get my drink on.

Our first stop is a tiny but upscale bar named Katerina's. I remember being so happy at this point because 1) it's really hit me that I'm in Greece 2) that wine from dinner really did the trick and 3) I've finally stopped converting euros to dollars in my head after every purchase. I have a few more drinks here and meet Natalie and Evan from Melbourne. We never did any type of formal introductions or icebreakers so it was up to everyone to make their rounds and meet everyone. Turns out Natalie is a dance teacher, so we talk about So You Think You Can Dance and I tell her Kelly and I danced for years (but I doubt anyone believed this after seeing some of my moves). This bar was more of a sit around and talk type of venue but for our next two stops this won't be the case.

At the next bar we go to the guy working at the door is wearing a Miami Heat jersey (D. Wade to be exact) and also happens to be rather attractive. Kelly and I hang on him for a few minutes but I don't think he even knew anything about the Heat. We go inside and the TV on the wall is playing nothing but clips of different animals mating. Elephants, turtles, meerkats... no animal was left behind. So this is Mykonos! Things get crazy here and we learn it's perfectly acceptable to dance on anything you want. There's a narrow ledge lining one wall of the bar and a few from our group climb up. Layne and Teneal even crowd surf here (how they weren't dropped is beyond me). We spot a small child wandering around the bar and are at first disturbed but then notice he's selling glowsticks (this is a normal occurence in any of the bars we visit for the rest of the trip). For some reason when you're drunk you just NEED glow sticks, so our group usually purchased a large quantity of whatever crap the kids in the bars are selling. By the time we leave this bar my drinks for the night have included beer, wine, champagne, mixed drinks, and shots yet I'm still totally coherent. Side note: Amazingly enough, I never blacked out, threw up or got hungover the entire time in Greece. My theory is I always woke up drunk and continued drinking so I never had a chance to sober up and get a hangover. Vacation Kerry is an unshakeable bitch. The next place we go to is Scandinavian Bar and it's a bar downstairs and a club with a huge dance floor upstairs. Of course we all head upstairs and continue dancing on top of anything we can climb. Scotty somehow managed to climb on top of a doorframe. Before long Kelly is hammered and wanders off by herself. I later find out she was meeting random weirdos, including the guy who worked at the front desk of our hotel... not at all surprising.

Later in the night I'm out on the front balcony with Staker and we see Dave rush out of the club carrying Lisa. It freaks me out and we hear they're on their way to the hospital. We later find out she was trying to climb onto Layne's shoulders and she fell off. She ended up with a fractured pelvis and for the rest of the trip she is on crutches. Yes, we had two gimps on our tour and I think that's a testament to the kind of group we were working with! The night ends with a drunken bus ride home and I go to bed anxious for the next day at the legendary Paradise Beach.

Day Three, Athens

Dave told us the "traditional" Greek breakfast is coffee and a cigarette, so we don't expect much from our included breakfast in the hotel dining room. I'm pleasantly surprised to find more than a pack of Marlboros waiting for us downstairs and have some bread, an apple, a hard boiled egg, and some orange juice (which is not real orange juice, it's more like Tang).

Only about half of our tour is going on the Acropolis Tour, one of our optional excursions. It costs 15 euro and includes transportation, a guided tour of the Acropolis, a stop at the first Olympic stadium, and free time in the Plaka shopping area. I'm surprised so few people on our tour chose to do this. One of the main reasons I wanted to come to Greece (other than getting blind drunk and acting completely inappropriate for 2 weeks) was to see the Parthenon. I later find out many of the people who didn't join us had been in Athens for a few days and already done this. Other people chose to go shopping instead (?!?!).

Traffic is horrendous so the bus ride to the Acropolis takes almost an hour. We sit near the Perth boys and spend most of the time discussing American and Australian cultural differences. We tell them that yes, everyone in America drives an SUV and no, you can't buy guns in supermarkets (although Craig makes a good point you can buy a gun in Walmart). They tell us they have kangaroos in their backyards but I'm not dumb enough to fall for that. I find I really have to concentrate when talking to the Aussies at first. I have a hard time understanding most of what they're saying not only because of their accent but because they use so much slang. One of the funniest parts of our conversation was when Craig was asking about the presidential election. He asks who we're voting for and when we tell him we voted for John Edwards in the primaries he thinks we're talking about the psychic guy from Crossing Over! This is one of many conversations I have during the tour that reminds me the world does not revolve around the U.S.(example: when telling people where I live I say Miami and come to find that is the only city in Florida anyone has heard of and most people don't know Florida is the lovely penis-shaped land mass sticking off the bottom of the U.S.). Craig, however, knew a lot about the states because he watches a lot of C.S.I.!

We finally arrive at the Acropolis and meet our Greek tour guide Alex, a rather flamboyant and discursive older man. I would love to hear some interesting facts about the ancient wonders but I can understand roughly 30% of what comes out of Alex's mouth. I giggle every time he says "fact" because it sounds like "fucked" (ladies and gentelmen, I'm mature). We follow Alex up the steep, rocky pathway leading to the top of the Acropolis. I comment there's no way this place is handicapped accessible and then watch as the guy on our tour who's on crutches works his way to the top faster than I do.

At first it is hard taking everything in considering I have to focus on where I'm stepping in order not to fall on my ass. Once I get over the throngs of people and find a good vantage point, I'm completely blown away by the Parthenon. This has always been one of my "must see before I die" sights. It's massive and perfectly constructed. I ponder how the Greeks carried everything up this huge hill to build this and wish I could have understood Alex because he probably explained the construction process. Kelly and I take a ridiculous amount of pictures of both the ruins and the beautiful views of Athens. On our descent back to the bus I lose my footing and fall, fortunately catching myself and not tumbling down the steps. This was the first of my many sober falls, which cost me an assload of points (-2 points per sober fall).

We get on the bus and drive through Athens while hearing about some historical buildings. I find it hilarious one of the places Alex points out to us is the Athens Hilton (I apologize for not taking pictures of this most impressive Greek landmark). We stop at the first Olympic stadium and get time to hop out and take pictures. This is pretty cool to see and it's still used for events. Amazingly it holds around 60,000 people.

For our next stop we're given a few hours in the Plaka district which is one of the nicer areas of Athens and known for its shopping and restaurants. Kelly and I walk around with the Perth boys in search of a place for lunch. I spot a few familiar stores on our walk, like H & M and Sephora. Practically everything in Greece is labeled in English. This is both convenient but frustrating as the only word I learn in Greek is kalimera (good morning). We really have no reason to attempt butchering the language since everyone we approach speaks English. We settle on a restaurant solely for the fact it serves gyros. I have a chicken gyro and my first Coke Light (much to my disappointment it tastes little like Diet Coke). Tzatziki sauce in Greece is utterly orgasmic and I can eat the stuff by itself. During lunch I find out the Perth boys also say "that's what she said." We're really not that different afterall...

After lunch we walk to Syntagmata Square and almost die while crossing the street to the parliament building to watch the changing of the guards. These poor guys wear the most ridiculous, non-threatening uniforms. The area is covered with pigeons and I sense Kelly's fear of another fly by pooping. The changing of the guards is entertaining and includes some pretty outlandish walking. We still have time to kill so we book it a few blocks to the Temple of Zeus. It's worth seeing but it's nothing more than a few columns in the middle of a huge gravel field. We meet back up with our group and its a much shorter bus ride back to the hotel. During the ride I find out Staker is also a devout Lionel Richie fan and he, like myself, owns a shirt emblazoned with the man himself! This greatly excites me as I realize I won't have to hide my ipod for fear of ostracization.

Everyone makes plans to go to the hotel pool when we return but first Kelly and I take a walk in search of an ATM since she will finally be able to take out money (word to the wise: don't wait until the day you leave town to tell your bank you're leaving the country... or just be like me and do absolutely nothing and still have your ATM card work). After we find an ATM and she successfully withdraws money (yay!)we spot our first European mullet and I admit it's probably the fanciest mullet I've ever seen. We point and laugh and continue on to a small supermarket to buy booze and snacks. We buy Stoli vodka, a liter of Sprite, some sort of citrus punch, bagel chips, a few bottles of water, and ice. I think it costs only 16 euro for all of that, which is insane because ordering one mixed drink with Stoli in this same neighborhood would almost cost that much. We go back to our room to change and fashion a cooler out of our trash can (classy!).

There's a decent crowd already at the pool. Kelly and I fix ourselves drinks with the vodka, sprite and fruit punch. We name our new drink "the muppet", which we learned earlier is slang for an asshole/moron in Australia. I soon whip out my ipod speakers and everyone seems to appreciate my cheesy music (note: one of the best things I brought on this trip were my ipod speakers, we used these almost constantly). We meet a couple who are on their honeymoon, Layne and Teneal. At first I'm dumbfounded as to why someone would go on a Contiki for their honeymoon but as soon as I see these two downing vodka tonics it becomes clear that they belong in our group. We're supposed to meet with Dave in the lobby by 5 p.m. to sign up and pay for our optionals so we drunkenly make our way inside. We decide to do every optional except for the Santorini day tour, volcano cruise, and the first group dinner. The optionals we sign up for cost 169 euro total. While we're waiting to sign up we meet Scotty (the guy on crutches) and find out he twisted his ankle after drunkenly falling between two boats while in Croatia. His foot is swollen and pretty gross and he tells us he's waiting for the Greek doctor to come write him a prescription. Given my track record I worry this will be me within a few days only I will make a much worse patient. We head back to the pool and continue to drink our faces off and have a great time with everyone.

We decided not to do the group dinner tonight since it costs 39 euro and is all the way back in central Athens. Instead we go back to the area we went out at last night to have dinner with the Ohio girls, Perth boys, and Jose (our fellow South Florida resident). We find a very reasonably priced but trendy restaurant called something like Oscar Brassiere that also happens to be playing kickass 80s music. Dinner is fantastic and cheap. I have risotto with chicken and broccoli and split a bottle of wine with a few others. It ends up costing me only 18 euro. We call it an early night and rest up before heading to Mykonos the next morning. But first, upon reaching the front of the hotel, we're greeted by Layne and Teneal on their balcony... wearing nothing but their underwear! They're hammered and had just gotten back from the optional group dinner. I decide I'm in love with the two of them.

Day Two, Athens

Our plane lands in Athens about 30 minutes early. We take a bus from the plane to the terminal, which was surprising because I thought this was a pretty major airport. From what I could tell this was only the case with international flights, the domestic airlines were parked at the terminals. Going through customs and getting our bags was painless. As we look for an ATM I notice the obnoxious drunk guys meeting up with another tour group. SWEET! Unfortunately Kelly is unable to take out money. She called her bank before we left Philly to let them know she would be overseas, yet somehow they made a mistake and put a fraud alert on her account. Meanwhile, my lazy ass never got around to calling the bank and I had no problem taking out money. Go figure. I take out 300 euro (about $460)and we head to the taxi queue.

Our taxi driver spoke limited English but still tried to speak to us. I tell him we're American and he lights up when he hears this. "New York City?" he asks. "No, Miami." This excites him and I feel reassured we won't be given a hard time as Americans. The cab ride is about 20 minutes and costs 25 euro. We later hear some of our tourmates were charged as much as 50 euro!

We roll up to the Seaview Hotel and it looks strangely like any given hotel on South Beach. It still has not hit us we're in Greece. The area we're staying in is called Glyfada which our tour manager describes as the Beverly Hills of Athens. It's a far cry from 90210, but still a pretty residential area. Our room is nice but small and has two twin beds pushed together. This is how the rest of our rooms on our trip are set up, too.

I warn Kelly that we're not allowed to flush toilet paper in Greece since the plumbing system is so old. She doesn't believe me and asks the woman at the front desk if this is true and the lady looks at her as though she has two heads... of course you can't flush toilet paper, you stupid American! We become well acquainted with the stainless steel trash bins we come to find next to every toilet. We also make a rule that we get negative 1 point for every time we forget to throw the paper in the trash bin. This proves difficult for me and I end up amassing around -30 points purely from toilet paper negligence. The funny thing is every toilet has a brush next to it which I used many a time to fish out my T.P., I'm pretty sure this is the main reason for the brush. Either that or the Greeks love to clean toilets.

We nap until 1 p.m. and then walk across the street to the beach. We pay 10 euro a piece just to enter the beach and at the time we assume you always have to pay for the beaches in Europe. Turns out this is a huge rip off and the last time we have to pay to go to a beach. Once again, we don't feel like we're in Greece as the beach has a very South Beach vibe: very trendy people, house music playing, and a trendy restaurant/lounge. We walk into the restaurant to buy water and everyone is staring at us. It's obvious we're the only non-Greeks on the entire beach. I approach the bar and upon hearing my accent the bartender asks where I'm from. Once he finds out I'm American he calls his friend over and they begin hitting on me and asking me to bring them back to America. They are practically drooling and it's completely uncomfortable. As much as American men are idiots, they aren't nearly this forward or horny. This is my first interaction with Greek men and I try to make it my last for the duration of the trip. It didn't help that this guy bore a strong resemblance to Jafar from Aladdin. I order two bottled waters for 3 euro which seems like a deal but we later find out this is a rip off. We will pay between .50 and 1 euro for water for the rest of the trip. We get the hell away from the perverted Greeks and set down our towels on the sand. This was another thing to make us stand out... we're the only people sitting on the sand. Everyone else had rented chairs and umbrellas. The beach is beautiful and the water is crystal clear. We spend about 2 hours sunning ourselves before heading back to the hotel. Kelly still needed to sort out her bank problems before we had to meet up with our group at 7:30 that evening.

We sit around the room for the next few hours during which time I discover neither my voltage converter nor hair straightener works. At first I'm upset and vow to buy a European straightener but I forget all about it by the time the sun goes down. For the duration of the trip my hair is wild and curly. The upside is it only takes me about 15 minutes total to get ready since I also wear minimal make up over the course of the trip. At 7:00 we head down to the lobby for a beer before we have our tour orientation. We order Mythos which is a Greek beer that tastes like a cross between Heineken and Budweiser. This will not be the last Mythos I have as it becomes my beer of choice for the next 2 weeks (well, maybe neck and neck with Corona... yes, I drank a lot of Corona which I usually don't touch at home).

At 7:30 our group begins to show up in the lobby. We sign up with our tour manager and I notice the majority of those who signed up before me are Australian and everyone's birthday is in the early 1980s. We take a front row seat next to the Ohio girls and our tour manager begins telling us what to expect on our tour. I have a hard time paying attention because all I want to do is turn around and start meeting everyone, but I do pick up on a few things. Our tour manager's name is Dave, he's from Botswana, he has a beautiful accent, and has no problem cursing. We're given a list of the optional excursions and he goes down the list describing each optional. He makes no secrets that one of the optionals, the volcano boat trip in Santorini, is an absolute waste of time and no one ever enjoys it. I appreciate his honesty and apparently so does the rest of the group as no one ends up signing up for it. We're given about 30 minutes before we have to meet for our included dinner. Kelly and I go back upstairs and I change since we're going out to a posh area in Glyfada after dinner. Kelly confesses she has a thing for Dave and I make fun of her. Little did I know!

The included dinner sucks: salad, extremely dry pork, potatoes and flan (Flan in Greece??? Where the fuck is the baklava??). I fill up on the potatoes and leave most of the pork. I didn't have high expectations for the food on this trip but luckily this is by far the worst meal I have the entire time. After dinner the whole group walks over to the nightlife area a few blocks from the hotel. I'm thankful the air is dry and there's a nice breeze, I would be drenched if I was to walk a few blocks at night in Florida. We sit with the Ohio girls and 3 boys from Perth who I had befriended on Facebook before the tour. It's startling how much the drinks cost at this place, but Dave warns us this is one of the priciest bars we will visit. Kelly and I try ordering Mythos but the bartender gives us Foster's (??). Before I know it I'm discussing the shocker with our table (the Perth boys didn't know what it is) and decide to hold off on telling everyone what a blumpkin is. What's up with me always teaching dirty words to foreigners? Last time I taught the Brits about teabagging, but this time I really outdid myself with blumpkins. I didn't waste any time establishing myself as a classy girl. We make a deal that I'll reveal what a blumpkin is on our first night in Mykonos. It ends up being an early night (yet I somehow spent 50 euro... told you it was pricey) but was still a good time getting to know a few people. I'm excited for the Acropolis tour in the morning and hope that after seeing the Parthenon it will finally hit me that I'm in Greece!

Day One, Fort Lauderdale to Philadelphia to Athens

Sometime last August, Kelly, Mandi and I were in the car on our way out for the night. The topic of dream vacations came up and we agreed on Greece and Australia as the ultimate destinations. We convinced ourselves we’d make it to one of those places by the end of the year but we talk big when we’re drinking, so at the time it seemed like another conversation we’d forget about in the morning. I had no idea 10 months later Kelly and I would be in Greece with a bunch of Australians...

It's barely past 5 a.m. when we set out for the Fort Lauderdale airport. Running on 4 hours of sleep, I'm too tired to grasp I will soon be in Greece. My suitcase only weighs 36 pounds, which is shocking considering I overpacked. I kept the weight down by packing some of my heavier things and some toiletries in my carry on. Basically I packed enough in my carry on to last me a few days in the event we lost our luggage. Our flight leaves promptly at 7:35 a.m. I make sure to stay awake in hopes of being as tired as possible for the 10-hour flight to Athens.

During the flight I start to worry I've set my expectations too high. I did so much research that I'm afraid there will be no surprises for me. Kelly and I discuss the possibility that our tourmates will be boring, hate Americans, find us annoying, or all of the above. What if I've spent all of this money and time only to have a mediocre trip?

Our plane lands around 10:30 and we easily find the train to take us into Central Philly. Our 6-hour layover gives us a chance to explore a city I otherwise probably wouldn't visit. I lament South Florida's lack of a proper public transportation system as we ride the train into town. It's $14 for a roundtrip ticket, which seems like a lot but still much cheaper than a taxi.

I printed out a map of the downtown area so we already know it's only a few blocks from the train station to the historical district. Of course, despite having a map, we first set out in the wrong direction for a few blocks. Once we're headed the right way we notice there is a large amount of homeless people (one with his hand down his pants, classy) and the area is seedy in general. I'm used to homeless people but it sucks that this was our first impression of the city. We pass a lot of drugstores but don't see any restaurants during the entire 6 block walk. I'm already wanting a Philly cheesesteak and yes, that was my main concern during our short visit.

It's obvious when we reach old Philadelphia. There's a beautiful open green square housing the Liberty Bell center and Independence Hall. I'd always thought the Liberty Bell was out in the open, but it has its own building. The line is long and it's hot outside, about 85 degrees (bear in mind this is my first time sweating in the cropped grey sweat pants I'm wearing... this will certainly not be the last time I wear them over the course of the trip). We wait about 30 minutes before getting inside. There are displays of all things Liberty Bell related before we get to the actual bell. I try to pay attention and read about some of the items, but I just can't get excited for the Liberty Bell china set or Liberty Bell cross stitching handiwork. I speed through the rest of the displays and there she is, the Liberty Bell in all her glory. It's bigger than I expected, and surrounded by tourists. It's a few minutes before we can get close enough to take pictures. This is a rite of passage as an American and I'm fortunate I can now say I've seen the bell. But really, it's just a bell with a big crack in it. Seeing it in person doesn't lessen or increase its symbolism. I didn't feel a rush of pride upon seeing it, it was just "OK, let's take some pictures and move on." I was more excited for my cheesesteak.

We exit the back door of the Liberty Bell center and are standing in front of Independence Hall. We make friends with a cop(who was having a good time blowing his whistle at people who weren't crossing at the crosswalk)who tells us tickets for Independence Hall are sold out for the day. Of course I inquire about the nearest cheesesteak establishment. Jim's, which is considered some of the best cheesesteaks in Philly, is too far of a walk given our time constraints, so we settle on Campos' Deli, about 3 blocks away. Campos' is a modest place but everything on the menu sounds delicious. They only accept cash so I use the ATM in the restaurant and get hit with a hefty fee (boo!). This is the last American money I will see for awhile.

The cheesesteak is divine but not what I expect: Cheez Whiz, quality thinly sliced beef, and a crusty hoagie. It's not at all greasy, either, which makes me feel a little better about eating the entire thing (save for a small bite I allow Kelly, who had to settle for a club sandwich since a long flight would be disastrous after eating Cheez Whiz). I'm completely satisfied after this meal and ready to see more sights.

We pass by a store named "Prom Headquarters" which has tuxedos in a wide range of colors (aqua, coral, every fluorescent imaginable)in the front window. We take this as a sign we're not in the nicest part of town and head a few blocks over. We end up at a small park with a few historic buildings where we spot two men dressed in traditional colonial outfits sitting on a bench under a tree. Are they paid to do this or do they just show up? One of them chats us up in some sort of Irish/English hybrid accent. We play along and find out he's a professional "gentleman of leisure." We tell him we're going to Greece and, since he lives in the 1700s, cannot grasp that we can make it to Greece in a day's time. We take pictures and then head back toward Independence Hall.

We walk until we reach the park behind Independence Hall and decide to relax for a while under the trees. We make a few phone calls and Kelly yelps when she feels something wet hit her cheek. A bird pooped on her face! She wipes it off before I'm able to get out my camera. We immediately leave, realizing the birds in the trees above see bullseyes on our foreheads. We head back toward the train station, first stopping at Walgreens for 5-hour energy shots (to be used only for emergencies in Greece... I end up only having 2 the whole time!) and Tylenol PM (to sleep on the plane).

We have little more than an hour to kill once we reach the airport. I stock up on 2 liters of water for the flight. This is the start of my mass consumption of water. While we're waiting we take out our Contiki documents to get ourselves pumped. Kelly leaves to use the restroom and while she's gone I'm approached by Julie, who'd seen us looking through our Contiki stuff. It turns out 3 girls on our flight are on our trip: Nicolette, Gabriella and Julie. They're from Cleveland and at the time we have no idea this is only the beginning of our airport relationship. We talk for a few minutes and I find out two of them are elementary school teachers and one is an accountant. They all seem cool so my worries about having a shitty group start to fade.

Once we're on the plane I can't help but notice two obnoxious and clearly drunk 20-something guys sitting two rows ahead of us. Before we even take off they are approached by two different flight attendants and are told they won't be allowed to drink during the flight. For awhile it seems like they might get thrown off the plane. I decide I hate both of them which means they will probably be on our tour. I can hear the liberal use of "bro" in their drunken banter. They talk loudly about how drunk they are but fortunately pass out a few hours into the flight.

What I remember of the flight wasn't so bad. We're served a pasta dish for dinner that's on par with a Lean Cuisine. The TVs are broken on the plane and we're never shown a movie. Kelly and I pop some Tylenol PMs and thanks to the window seat I sleep for about 3 hours.